Well February 2016 has been a bittersweet month for me so far…
A month that is filled with beautiful memories such as, celebrating my Valentine’s Anniversary with the most amazing, kind, patient, (for the most part, it’s good to have some sass in there) understanding, beautiful soul of a man, any women could wish for, but unfortunately having to share this special memory in the hospital…
What an adventure that was! It was my longest stay in hospital, next to being on bed rest with Josh, and it about drove me bananas, but funnily enough, in a good way.
I was given no choice but to take these bountiful drugs, that calm the uncontrollable flare that I got myself stuck in.
I have a Mast Cell disease called Mast Cell Activation Syndrome. A condition that causes my body to produce WAY too many mast cells. You see mast cells are a great thing, they protect and alert our body to all sorts of dangers, and actually work to protect you from said danger. But in a condition like mine, with too many mast cells, we are in a constant high alert mode. Always in what we call a ‘flare’ just beneath the surface. Because we are so sensitive in our alert mode, almost anything can trigger us and cause us to go into ANA. (Anaphylaxis)
When we think ANA, we automatically think you can’t breath, thankfully this has only happened to me a handful of times. There are many with my condition that this happens to daily!!
When I am going into ANA, I usually feel like an elephant is sitting on my chest, not a nice vibe, but I stay calm and remind myself I can breath, I use my inhaler, take my pills and relax, or meditate, works well for me. Sometimes though,mit’s my stomach that goes into ANA, which was the case that brought me into hospital. I must have eaten something my body didn’t like, and I went into a complete flare, I was so sick that after a week at home sick I was entering extreme danger zone.
So in I went…
I hate the way all these meds make me feel but they are doing their job, and slowly but surely (18 days later) I was starting to stabilize.
This was frightening for me, I have never been this sick before, it really gets a girl riled. But I never lost my faith that I would see this through, and place this in my past along with all of these amazingly tough lessons life likes to throw at me.
You know what keeps me going? I never cease to amaze myself!! Sounds funny, but I have have gone through a lot of well, shit, and I always follow the exact same pattern to work my way through it, learn from it, and place it in my past.
It starts with my usual pity party, now don’t be judging, this is so good for me. I cry, I feel sad and sorry for myself, but then I always ask WHY?? (I most often yell it, lol) and it’s then, that I start finding the answers that that I need to start working my way through this.
So today, as I’m resting at home with my family, recuperating and preparing to push through this adventure, I find myself once again, feeling so unbelievably blessed.
I have already come through the worst of it, as I am staying stable at home (Woot!) but I have much work to do to repair my body from all the damage this flare has done.
I will heal, Its already begun, so the blessings are bountiful and are what I choose to focus on when I feel frustrated with how hard or how long this is taking (Impatient little Imp that I am, I have so much to do, and I’m so far behind yikes!!)
I definitely need to work harder on my patience, I’ve got the patient part down pat, why is the rest so hard?! LOL!!
So that’s my February so far! I wanted to share this with you because I am trying to open up and share a bit more of myself. I want you to know the real authentic me.
I cannot thank you all enough for following my work, and blessing me with your openness and kindness, prayers and love, and I am so honored to be walking this soul path with you. ❤️
I would like to send out a very special thank you to my unbelievably supportive team of #WUVIP Soul sisters, Shari Alyse, Anna Pereira, Kimberly Rogers Bayne, Heather Durling, Ashley Brewer, Heather Corinne Lang, Cheryl O’Connor.
I could not have made it through those darkest moments without you.
The love, light-circles, prayers and pep talks, helped me find the strength I needed to push forward. I will always be eternally grateful and I am incredibly honored to be a part of thewellnessuniverse.com ❤️
Sending much love, and light-filled blessings,